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Month: May 2010

Motherhood

Becoming "That" Mother

Anyone who has spent any amount of time in a grocery store, a parking lot, a laundromat, or any public place has witnessed the antics of "that" mother. You know: The one who goes berserk because her kid was running unchaperoned down the aisle and…
Madness

Douche Bag Drama – Part 2

Retta's DEETS So: I woke up on May 21st ready for my date with Drama to ensue around 1:15pm, the scheduled time of my daughter's event. What happened instead was quite unexpected and quite the opposite of my expectations. I prepared myself for a rather…
Motherhood

Built to Make Babies

In the world of reproductive activity there are 3 types of women. There are those who are barren and will never have children: In fact, some are so allergic to their mate's semen that they break out in rashes upon seminal contact. Then there are those in…
Madness

Douche Bag Drama – Part 1

Silly me for thinking that this summer was going to start off on a positive and drama-free note. I drove my daughter up to school today, excited that she had gotten through the year with relatively few set backs. Tomorrow is the last day of…
Marriage

What a Happy Anna-vuh-sary!

Man, I'm so giddy I can't even spell the word! This Friday, Marshall and I celebrated 5 years of wedded bliss. It's been fantastic for me, but I don't know how great it's been for him. I am a certified basket case after all. *Chortle!*…
Say what??

Caught in the Oprah Effect

Man. That daggone Oprah. There I was, Monday afternoon minding my own business watching the Oprah show. It's one of the few pleasures I have every blessed day. Monday's episode was all about Harpo Hook Ups, where the Harpo team goes out and makes dreams…
Madness

Jehova's Little Troll

An old co-worker of mine has a friend named Barbara who has a 30 year old son with Down's Syndrome. His name is LT. One day, Barbara left for work as usual and left LT at home to his own devices. It was a typical…
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