Motherhood

It's been 13 months and I'm still pregnant

Peeing, peeing, peeing. I've been pregnant with the SAME child for over a year it seems, and my nights and days are spent peeing. 80% of the time spent after I lay my head on the pillow is spent lumbering to the toilet to pee,…
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Va-ca-shon!!

I'm about to go on vacation at Hotel de Northside Hospital. Train pulls out of the station at 7 am sharp! I can't wait! No more screaming kids for two whole days. The next child I hear crying will be the one being yanked from…
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I AM ON STRIIIIKKKEEE!!!!

THAT DOES IT! I will no longer try to improve the well being and hygiene of my family. I give up on that part of motherhood. From now on, my obligations are only the newborn and myself. From THIS DAY FORTH, I vow to be…
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Where do you see yourself in 5 years?

When I was getting ready to go to college in 1996, that was the big interview question we couldn't wait to be asked from a potential employer. We had whole sessions about the appropriate answers to give, interview gems and catch phrases that would wow…
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Back to school "hateration"

Back to school time can be a source of joy and aggravation. For the parents who have toughed it out with listless children for an entire summer, something breaks on the inside when that school bus pulls up to the stop for the first time.…
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