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Essays in: Madness

Categories:  MotherhoodMarriageMadnessMusingsPhoto Essay FridayRHKOASay what??The South African SeriesUncategorizedGH2013
Madness

‘Like Cotton Twines’ Is A Stitch in Time

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Imagine someone in your family committed a horrible crime. Perhaps your uncle committed adultery or your father murdered a man and buried his body in a shallow grave. Such crimes cannot go disregarded or unpunished. Society would descend into anarchy and chaos would govern. The right course of action would be to make sure that […]

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Madness

David Oyelowo’s Wife Is Wicked: Part 2

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January 2nd, 2018 10:01 am   A woman’s squealing voice shatters the silence. “David, darling!” A man yawns. It is the yawn of a man content with his life and all that he surveys. “Yes, darling?” Footsteps pound down the stairs, announcing the arrival of the woman into his man lair. “The invitations to the […]

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Madness

How I Ended Up On the Set Of The Hit Television Series, ‘Outlander’

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Ok guys. I KNOW it seems like this is the year where I’ve deliberately fallen into stuff (i.e. on my back being dry humped in a DC club by a random stranger or becoming the sole provider of reusable grocery totes for a local deli for a time), but I swear to you that these […]

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Madness

Dear White People: Telling Black People That They Are ‘Not Like Other Black People’ Is Not a Compliment.

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I suppose I should’ve been ready for it. It was a Monday afternoon, after all. These sorts of things only happen during queer times. Like when the 13th of the month falls on a Friday, when the moon is full during its lunar cycle, and – of course – Mondays. I was so relieved that […]

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Madness

‘De Ting Go Skrrrr Ka’ Guy is a Ghanaian. Here Are Some of the Clues I Purposely Ignored.

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De ting go skkrrrrr ka has made its way into and took over the zeitgeist of September 2017. Very few pop culture moments have staying power beyond 3 weeks, and as the interest in this one begins to wane, we give thanks to the BBC, Charley with the blue eyes, MC Quakez and Shakez and […]

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Madness

There Are No ‘Bro Code’ Discounts in Entrepreneurial Families

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My husband and I are entrepreneurs. He writes code for a living and I sell any and everything. I’m not saying that to be funny. From essential oils to smutty books (and I think I just came up with an idea for a combo pack!), I am a basically an e-market queen. It is just […]

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Madness

How Do Our Vets Feel About Seeing Nazi’s Thrive on American Soil?

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My grandfather (may he party in eternal peace) served in the United States army for 3 years. He was stationed at an air force base in Georgia where he worked as a cook and received distinction for his prowess as a thespian. (Now I know where I get my flair for the dramatic from.) He […]

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Madness

RompHims Are the Next Logical Step in Men’s Fashion

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Let us be honest with one another: Where men’s fashion is concerned, it’s been a race to (and in many cases, from) the crotch for a very long time. I don’t generally keep a keen eye out for male fashion – primarily because it’s so repetitive and boring – but I did note when hemlines […]

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Madness

Even God and Your Daddy Know #MenAreTrash

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Beloveds: I won’t be keeping you long this morning. I just stopped by to share a word that God confirmed in my spirit late in the midnight hour. Yesterday was Mother’s Day, and the occasion was nearly overshadowed by the kvetching of a certain group of people who have taken great offense with a hash […]

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Madness

James Comey Discovers White People Behavior Can Have Black People Consequences.

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Donald Trump fired FBI Director James Comey this week. What is unclear is if Comey’s firing came on the heels of a recommendation from the Deputy Attorney General or – if as Trump announced on Lester Holt’s interview on Thursday – he had made the decision to fire Comey regardless of any recommendation. Prior to […]

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Madness

How To Survive Those Terrifying Moments When An Airline Won’t Let You Pee

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The airline industry is just out of control. There hasn’t been a week that’s gone by this month that hasn’t featured some form of passenger abuse. As a rule, I do not to travel by air. Unless the chances of reaching my destination are absolutely impossible unless by flight – say from Atlanta to Johannesburg […]

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Madness

Jidenna’s Appearance on the ‘Good Morning America’ Vexed Me

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You see what happens when you underestimate a man with a conk and a pocket watch? You think he’s innocuous and then one day: BOOM! You are sitting on your sister’s sofa with your heart in your throat, swallowing, breathing and pumping blood through your veins, simultaneously failing at all three. Why because the shiny […]

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Madness

Post Carnival Relief: These Are My Confessions

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You guys are probably going to see videos of me on ratchetblackness.com or World Star – but before you judge me, allow me to confess and explain how all of this happened.   Before he was struck by an illness that has kept him housebound, a friend of mine used to go soca parties every […]

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Madness

Vicki Yohe Unleashes Peak Beckery On The Church

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When I saw a former co-worker refer to Vicki Yohe as ‘Tricky Yohe’ as a result of some foolery she had allegedly executed, I bristled. I challenged him to show me evidence of what the warbler had done to earn the moniker ‘tricky’. Surely this was a case of mistaken identity! I’ve seen Vicki Yohe […]

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Madness

Is Sugabelly Sick… Or Are We Just Too Repulsed to Admit That’s She’s Right?

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Sugabelly is a personality on Twitter who has gained notoriety through expressing radical views on feminism and her disdain for certain aspects of Nigerian culture, among other things. I followed her for about 24 hours 2 or more years ago, but I found her espoused positions on Abrahamic faiths not just intolerant (which is inconsequential, […]

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Madness

2016’s Final Abomination: The Desolation of Jollof Rice

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I’m getting pretty tired of writing about how awful 2016 has been and continues to be. My fatigue has compelled me to ignore several events that have transpired in pop culture and favor silence instead of comment. It’s not everything that requires a verbal (or written) reaction, abi? But dear brothers and sisters, there is […]

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Madness

Theory: Why The 66% Bent Over To Give Trump A Better Angle From Which to Grab ‘Em By The Pussy

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Up until 3 weeks before the election, I was 80% certain that Donald Trump was going to win the presidency. I had voiced this repeatedly on Facebook, to the horror of my Democrat leaning/voting friends. As far as race and justice are concerned, I haven’t had faith in America in a long time – not […]

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Madness

I Need My Finances To Find The Hem Of Jesus’ Garment…Quickly

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My phone rang deep in the night as I was settling my head into my pillow. It was a dear friend calling from the US. “Girl, I know it’s late where you are…but we haven’t spoken in a while so I don’t care.” I laughed at her candor and told her I didn’t mind. I […]

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Madness

Would A Cheeto in Chief Actually Be That Bad?

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There are only 11 days to go before the US election is upon us. Depending on who comes out the victor, half of the country will be in mourning for the next four years while the other half will move forward with muted optimism. No matter what side of the divide you’re on, we (excluding […]

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Madness

Her Dress Is Not the Problem… Your Mind Is

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Last week we saw #TeacherBae briefly captivate our online attention. #TeacherBae is the hashtag that became Patrice Brown’s – an Atlanta public school paraprofessional – digital appendage after pictures that she posted of herself at work and/or at play on Instagram went viral. She’s a beautiful woman with a full, curvy body. Black Twitter did […]

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Madness

Evidence of a Dark Heart

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Friends, Diaspora, Innanets Fam: Lend me your ears. But first, lend me your pupils. Look at this! No… Don’t turn away. See this abomination for what it is! This is a demonic manifestation. A Satanic offering. The wages of Lucifer’s war against the Almighty. What in God’s holy name is this and why would someone […]

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