Essays in: Madness

https://twitter.com/KirstieKwarteng/status/746457462614671360 None of my English friends are actually “English”. They are English men and women of Nigerian/Ghanaian/Jamaican decent. Their ties to England (and to their precious, burgundy UK passports) usually begins with some 419-marriage-for-papers; or with their parents lucking out by getting pregnant and delivering them in the UK whilst in university during the 70s; […]

There’s ALWAYS some sort of bribery or money bilking scam going on at Kotoka International Airport. Between the yellow fever vaccination booklet scam, the baggage handlers stealing your luggage, and the customs officers’ expectant query about what you have “brought them from America”, it’s always a miracle when the traveler exits the airport’s sliding doors […]

And the Bible says: “If a woman wears a short skirt and tight jeans a man shall look upon her lustfully and commit adultery in his heart.” – Jesus H. Christ, 2000+ years ago. No? That’s not what your Bible says in Matthew 5? Coulda fooled me! The way we police women’s sartorial choices “based […]

Okay. Fine. Fine! I admit that getting a set of 5 books for a cool GHC 100 might not constitute the “best decision” you will make this weekend. I mean, you could make a first ever decision to invest in mutual funds that could yield you thousands of dollars eventually…but if you’re looking for immediate […]

 “Life is just a party, and parties weren’t meant to last.” – 1999 It’s funny. The range of emotions one experiences when you lose someone you love. I’ve lost people before…folks I’ve touched and hugged in the flesh and I mourned their absence. Their departure from this world into the created a vacuum that in […]

At 2:30 AM on Sunday morning, I decided that I wanted to sell 400,000 copies of Sally and the Butterfly by the end of 2016. It’s “impossible”, but they say that if you shoot for the moon, you’ll land among the stars. It is also said that if you want something you’ve never had before […]

I saw this on Instagram yesterday and my heart nearly jumped out of my chest. I mean. My God. I could NOT believe what I was reading. How was I seeing what I was seeing? Who was the man who threw these words together to spout this nonsense? Surely, it had to be a white […]

“When y’all get home from school you need to come eat up all these cup cakes you took!” “Yes, Mommy!” Their little bodies disappeared onto the bus and then they were off. I couldn’t what I was yelling at my children… or that it was necessary to bark this command in the first place. I […]

I repeat: How Could I Have Not Invited The MOM Squad to the Release of ‘Madness & Tea’??? Sooo…You all know I wrote a book (or five). I’ve told you about it, we’ve talked about it, now it’s time to party about it! Can you believe I told the Twitterverse and Facebookville, but never said […]

Merry Christmas, Merry Christmas, Merrrrr’ Kritmah! This is a special time of year for most people. For others, the holidays can be very hard for myriad personal reasons. They are a reminder of people whom have been lost, or of broken relationships, or that one crazy aunt who handcrafted pink bunny pajamas and who truly […]

There are two types of people in this world where Christmas music is concerned: Those who love it, and those who don’t. You can’t be “neutral” about Christmas music. It’s just not possible. As for me, I happen to fall in the category that loves the hokeyness of holiday tunes and like millions of other […]

No, I’m not pregnant. And I’m not adopting (yet). Every time a woman hollers about having “an announcement”, folk assume a baby is involved. DAG. I mean, just because I look like I ate a baby doesn’t mean I’m having one. Okay, so yeah. I AM having another baby… but not the sort made of […]

It’s the holiday season at long last! Yes, sir! It’s that time of year that children all over the world have been looking forward to for the past 11 months. It’s time for parents to PAY UP! They’ve been good at school and in the grocery store with the promise of that new Lego set, […]

It’s hard to believe, but Thanksgiving has officially gone global. Millions of people representing the gumbo that is our humanity celebrated the holiday that marks the apex of an American genocide and land grab in their own unique ways. Twitter entertained and enthralled us with various versions of Thanksgiving with families of different ethnicities including […]

We are introduced to the power of music from our infancy, cautioned about it in our religious lives, rendered mesmerized by its power in our private moments. “Scientists” have long convinced expecting mothers that by exposing their babies to classical music from Back and Brahms, they will exponentially increase the intelligence of that child. Pastors […]

“I think Rae Dawn Chong is the only black woman to fly a plane in a crunch time situation.” “Who?” “Rae Dawn Chong. You know…with the curly hair?” “Is she Chinese? Her last name is ‘Chong’…” “Babe. Tommy Chong is her dad. Cheech and Chong?” Marshall grabs his iPhone and sets about Googling. He has […]

Something happened to me at work this wee that I thought would be best re-told in rhyme. *Sigh*. Here goes….                       ***** I work part time at a retail store Because I love shoes and things covered in rhinestone It’s also so that I can […]

Greetings, saints. I won’t be keeping you long today because I actually have to work on a book of short stories exclusively written for a certain sister of mine, so brevity will have to be the order of the day. Do you consider Black women to be funny? No, seriously…think about it. Can/are Black women […]

This is one of those stories I was going to wait to tell my grand kids to serve as a moral or a fable, but I guess I’ll tell it to y’all now. Just hold on till the end. ****** As a teenager, I frequently found myself the subject of rumors – the quality of […]

There is an article on Medium that has been floating around the internet for almost a week now. It deals with one African woman’s (country of origin unknown and unclear) umbrage with African/Black Americans “appropriating” African culture. As a blogger, I am reluctant to participate in a public pile-on as I’m sure I’ve written my […]

LAFA. Slangs. Timbalands in 100 degree weather and humidity at 140%. An NY “kep” tilted just to the side to indicate that you are saturated with that certain “I-don’t-care-ism”. (Or perhaps your African head is too big for the kep, who knows?” These are just a few of the trappings of the African hip hop […]