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Essays in: Madness

Categories:  MotherhoodMarriageMadnessMusingsPhoto Essay FridayRHKOASay what??The South African SeriesUncategorizedGH2013
Madness

How Six White Women Would Have ‘Quickly’ Shot Shaquille O’Neal, According to Geraldo

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I couldn’t believe what I was hearing and seeing, so I played it twice more. My ears were not deceiving me. Once again, Geraldo Rivera was blaming an unarmed teen for his violent, and apparently slow and painful death. Dr. Bao already confirmed that it took Trayvon Martin anywhere from one to three minutes to […]

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Madness

A Rant for Trayvon and Against the Society That Freed His Murderer

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I’m going to say some things on this post that are going to cost me some followers, some readers, maybe even some friends. I absolutely do not care. I’m going to say some things about White people. I’m going to say some things about Black people. I’m going to make liberal use of the f-bomb, […]

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Madness

I’ve Pinpointed Why I’m SO Upset with This Hampton University Flier

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I’ve told you how I ended up at the university I went to, right? No? Well gather ‘round chil’run! It’s an amusing story, best told with brevity. My mother, as some of you know, was (and I think, still is) a militarized Black woman. She didn’t like White folk, but she learned to get along […]

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Madness

My Father’s 35 Minute Rant on Imported Toothpicks and Other Profundities

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I always wait too long to talk to my father. The last time we talked was – what? – two weeks ago? It’s to imagine I went a full two years without talking to the old man… “Yes… Abena Owusua. What do you want?” “Kwasi Gyekye. How are you this evening?” “Hmmm. I’m okay. My […]

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Madness

I Have No Thoughts on Angelina Jolie and her Breast Cancer

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I opened my inbox today and found a note from my favorite teacher. I was all at once excited. We have a pretty decent bond and have managed to keep in touch, even though I have not been under his tutelage in seventeen years. I tore into his message, which read this in part: Howdy? […]

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Madness

I Think I Was at a Gay Church, But I’m Not Sure… Part 2

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The excitement in the room was contagious. Three rows behind us was the Queen’s Hallelujah Quartet – four women whooping, and hollering, and screaming “AMEN!” every time there was mention of the Fragrance Protector’s accomplishments. Finally, she came to the tiny stage. I strained my neck to get a better look her. As she prepared […]

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Madness

I Think I Was at a Gay Church, But I’m Not Sure… Part 1

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We’re human. We judge other humans. We just do. I am judged every time I step out of my house, and I’ve come to live with it. People look at me and think “African American female, natural hair, 4 kids. She must be unmarried, Democrat, on some form of public assistance.” Then they find out […]

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Madness

The Girl Who Dreamt of Writing a Book

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It’s a question that every child gets asked at some point in their life: “What do you want to be when you grow up?” When I was between the ages of 8 and 10 I knew exactly  what I wanted to be when I grew up. “A baker, a writer, an actress and a mermaid,” […]

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Madness

My Father’s Epic 20 Minute Rant on Obama, Ambolley and Current Events

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My Aunt Elizabeth passed away a little less than a month ago and was buried over the weekend. She was a three years older than my dad and was one of my favorites. With the stark reminder that all life comes with an expiration date, I decided to call the old man to check up […]

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Madness

Duets with Ambolley: The World Ain’t Ready!

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Every once in a while, something magical happens that shifts the course of your existence. It’s rare that someone who does not bear the last name ‘Gyekye’ takes me by the hand and guides me into M.O.M. mode, but that’s what Gyedu-Blay Ambolley did last night. Like a newly dropped leaf floating wantonly on babbling, […]

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Madness

Douche Garden Part Deux

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I was in love with a Douche Bag once. I’ve written extensively about him here on MOM over the years. I’ve talked about the numerous times I’ve paid his bills, financed his dry cleaning, brought him food, bore his baby, paid some more bills, and finally ended up in court. HE took ME to court […]

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Madness

A Garden of Douche Bags at a Store Near You

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Nobody knows what it’s like to work in retail. You think you have an idea, but until you’ve experienced the genuine horrors of working with the public, you really have no idea. Being a retail worker is a multifaceted job. You have be a janitor, cocktail waitress, psychologist and peace advocate while occasionally throwing in […]

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Madness

The Day I Unwittingly Objectified a Music Legend: Ambolley

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I didn’t set out with sexual harassment on my mind, but it’s one of those unfortunate consequences of giving an individual like me access to a keyboard, a smartphone, a podium…pretty much any vehicle that allows one to communicate with humanity. You see, sometime last week, I got a tweet from Gyedu Blay Ambolley. He […]

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Madness

Vilentine’s Day

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The title is not a misprint. VILENTINE’S Day. There is a vile side to Valentine’s Day, my friends – a slimy sequence of events that occur during a day that was created to honor love and affection. It turns out that not everyone has noble intentions for Cupid’s favorite holiday. There are those who go […]

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Madness

Why Does American Hunger Look SO Different From African Hunger???

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Close your eyes and imagine the face of Hunger. (Now go ahead and open them so that you can finish reading the rest of this post.)  What does Hunger look like to you? Is it a frail Black African child with ashy skin, belly swollen from kwashiorkor, lumbering aimlessly about his village? Is it a […]

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Madness

We Should Not Need A Feminist Movement in Ghana

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“I can’t speak for the rest of Africa, but I can say for sure that in Ghana, we treat our women very badly.” My father had nosed his way into a conversation I was having with a childhood friend who had come to visit me a few years ago. I am always happy to have […]

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Madness

Blacktanic

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There are always sirens blaring in Roswell. Fire trucks, police cars, security teams – whatever. So when I heard the tornado sirens I took note, but barely paid attention. My mind was fixed on something else. One of the managers had offered me extra hours at work, and you know how “we” are when it […]

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Madness

My Old Man’s 20 Minute Independence Day Rant

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This morning I woke up with hopeful exuberance. Ghana turned 56 years old at midnight, and even though the country still has many of the same challenges that it possessed on the eve of independence (and some our ancestors couldn’t have possibly imagined) I opened my eyes and imagined what the country might be in […]

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Madness

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When Lunks Don’t Know Their Locker Room Limits We’re going into MOM Mode tonight people. Get your sensory faculties screwed in tight! But before we dive into the pit, I need you to do something. Imagine you’ve got a fist full of cold, wet lotion seeping down your knuckles. Now rub your hands together furiously. […]

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Madness

Go Find a Mountain and Climb It

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Women’s issues have been all over the global news lately. With headlines ranging from the horror of domestic violence to the struggles so-called ‘left over women’ in China, one can’t help but look at herself and ponder her place in the world and what society assumes that place is. In my circle, the issue of […]

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Madness

Shopping While Sensitive

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Working in retail is a lot like holding position in public office. You have to have thick skin, be ever ready to face derision and scorn, but somehow feign appreciation for the maltreatment meted out to you. Of course, a politician’s six-figure salary compared to my $8/hour as a part time retail associate makes this […]

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