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Essays in: Marriage

Categories:  MotherhoodMarriageMadnessMusingsPhoto Essay FridayRHKOASay what??The South African SeriesUncategorizedGH2013
Marriage

Confession: I Have A Thing For Pale, Frail White Men

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Interracial dating and marriage can be a very tricky thing, depending on your geographic location. My sister went to California a few years ago with her Black American boyfriend and came back to report that they were the oddest couple in whatever city she was in. (I forget.) NO ONE was dating anyone of the […]

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Marriage

Every Man Sounds Like a Wounded Wookiee to his Wife

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Good day to you, saints! I ain’t gwine keep ya long today. There is just a quick observation I have made that I wanted to share with you. Perhaps you have noticed it to. This is an exercise for both men and women: Close your mind’s eye if you would, and imagine a might grizzly […]

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Marriage

“Should Christian Men Hit it from The Back?” Well, Since You Asked….

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This evening I received a very odd, and rather unexpected text from a woman in my church. It was unexpected because I rarely have contact with said woman, and secondly, because of the nature of said text. We do not know each other like that. Like what, you ask. See here: Maleaka, I have a […]

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Marriage

Welcome to My Church!

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Saints! I ain’t gwine keep you long on this Monday mernin’. I just wanted to share a memory that came back to me after I had a conversation online earlier today. Someone had shared with me that she had gone to a wedding this weekend, where as usual, sexism and simplicity (of mind) were on […]

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Marriage

Should You Trust Your Spouse Unreservedly?

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I recently wrote an article in support of Itz Tiffany on Adventures after videos of her having sex with her husband were released into the ether by no one other than her (now ex) husband. Yes. Let that sink in. Apparently, his motivation for releasing the videos was to reduce, shame and demoralize her with […]

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Marriage

Lessons on Accepting and Tolerating Domestic Violence Start Early for Little Girls

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By now you’ve seen the Ray Rice video where the Ravens running back gets into an elevator with his fiancé, punches her unconscious and then drags her out of the elevator like trash. They have since tied the knot/jumped de broom/ whatever you want to call the fiasco when a woman marries her abuser. It’s […]

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Marriage

What Are Your Marital Codes?

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There are all kinds of marriages: Marriages of convenience, polygamous marriages, arranged marriages, marriages to the gods. Some people even marry their pets. Today we’re going to focus on plain ol’ dull, hetero-normal, missionary position, “What do you want to eat for dinner, bae?” marriage…if that’s alright with you, dear Reader. I like reading (certain) […]

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Marriage

Let’s Face It: Most Pastors Aren’t Equipped to Deal with ‘Sexual Immorality’

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Some people are so heavenly minded that they are no earthly good, and that includes quite a number of men who stand behind their Plexiglas or stained oak pulpits Sunday after Sunday. To say that they are “heavenly minded” is even being generous, in my books. These men are usually “budget minded”, conjuring up sermons […]

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Marriage

What Do You Mean You’ve Never Heard of ‘Sex Shoes’?

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I stared at the bride-to-be in complete astonishment. I repeated the question once more. “Ah. What do you mean you’ve never heard of ‘sex shoes’?” “Miss Malaka…I don’t know what that is!” she half wailed. She looked at her maid of honor for support. The young woman shook her head to indicate that she was […]

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Marriage

Is Marriage The Silver Bullet to Ending Poverty?

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There has been an interesting discussion brewing in social media about the benefits of marriage as they relate to “ending poverty”. It’s no mistake that this discussion is taking place now. We’re in an election year and politicians are pandering to their respective bases. Everyone, Democrat or Republican, wants to be seen as serious on […]

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Marriage

The Charmed Life of the Female Bowerbird

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Men. They are SO convinced that they are at the apex of the animal kingdom; that by virtue of the fact that they are men, they are inherently superior to all other life on earth. When a man encounters an animal that runs faster, swims quicker or is more ferocious in the face of conflict, […]

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Marriage

Could You Marry a Man who Has Had HUNDREDS of Sexual Partners?

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Whew! MOM Squad. This is the question that has been burning on my mind all weekend. I must unburden myself. In the process, I’m going to do my best not to disclose anything that might give this couple away in case they are watching this space, but let’s get into it! I got a call […]

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Marriage

Black Men Want to Be Treated Like Pets

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A more fair title would have been ‘SOME Black Men Want to be Treated Like Pets’, but the little quantifier – some – wouldn’t’ve made you click as quickly on this link as you did, would it? Welcome to my little web. Muahahahahaaaa….!!!! I shan’t keep you long at all. This is a hard core, […]

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Marriage

It Took a Man To Help Me Understand Why Oprah Never Married

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Condi Rice is back in the news. It appears she has been tapped to join a 12-18 person selection committee for the BCS. Pat Dye, 70-something year old former Auburn University coach, couldn’t be more explicit his displeasure. Of Ms. Rice’s experience he says “All she knows about football is what somebody told her. Or […]

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Marriage

You’re Never Just Marrying a ‘Person’.

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I used to be really naïve about love and relationships. Now that I’m firmly in my 30’s, I find myself in that space between naivety and cynicism where matters of the heart are concerned; and I’m fervently trying to becoming a full-blown pessimist. As you well know by now, I share my affections with several […]

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Marriage

The World Natural Hair Show: 2013

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*Sigh!!!* I should have taken more pictures… There are two things I look forward to every year: Our annual vacation overseas, and the Natural hair show in Atlanta. (There was a time I looked forward to three things every year, but now that my uterus is no longer serving as a baby vending machine, I […]

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Marriage

From the Mouth of Marshall: A Few Ramblings on Marriage, Money and Malaka

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A few people called me “mad” for having a problem taking money from my husband, and I understand way. But even more interestingly, one commenter said that he and his wife have a similar dynamic in their home, and that he wondered what my husband’s perspective might be on the matter. After all, even when […]

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Marriage

I Have Trouble Taking Money From My Husband

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My husband is a wonderful man and an excellent spouse. I’ve extolled his virtues on M.O.M. on so many occasions that I’ve had to stop for fear of being accused of idol worship or braggadocio. After all, with 50-60% of all Christian marriages ending in divorce, wouldn’t it appear conceited for me to talk about […]

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Marriage

Your Woman Desperately Wants to Make You a Sandwich

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At some point in her relationship, every woman will face a critical decision. Some of us have been presented with this test and failed abysmally. Others can’t imagine the torture that this trial will bring. In many cases, it will set or change the tone of your relationship. “Hey baby…can you get me a sandwich?” […]

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Marriage

Discovering the Lost Art of Begging

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For years, whenever my husband and our family went on a trip, I sat obediently in the passenger’s seat and did my best to keep him company by chattering on about this and that or whatever came to mind. His brow was always in a perpetual furrow as he took the wheel, and I assumed […]

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Marriage

Spark Park Deux!

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A rush of wind and leaves followed the women into the backdoor. Emily solemnly laid her bible on the coffee table and rested her head in the palm of her hand. Samantha rubbed her shoulders and cooed soothingly at her. Abiola looked around for something to do. As absurd as the whole affair was, she […]

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