I’ve written frequently about my fears about raising a Black boy in America. I read somewhere that there is nothing quite so loathsome as an 8 year old Black boy. They travel in packs, they get into stuff, and they’re no longer considered as “cute” and “harmless” as they previously may have been before they […]
It’s easy to tell what my 8 year old is thinking. She’s talkative, and will generally tell you what she’s pondering without prompting or solicitation. “Do sloths wear pajamas to sleep, Mommy?” “Oh Lord, I pray that we get home in time to eat those delicious noodles that Daddy was making; In Jesus’ name, amen.” […]
I was watching What Not to Wear when Aya burst into the room with a scowl on her face. Clinton Kelly was telling a woman how her ill-fitting trousers made her crotch look a rectangle. My daughter cut short my contained chuckles with a question I knew I was going to have to answer, but […]
Yesterday I received a series of terse tweets from my “namesake”, Abena. “How come you have not blogged abt the #steubenville rape? Why the silence? Don’t u feel sense of outrage? What if it was (one) of ur *girls*?” Ah. I don’t like to be attacked like that. I asked her why she was being […]
If you didn’t catch this Wednesday’s episode of Law & Order: SVU (entitled Funny Valentine), it’s definitely worth checking out online. Like the entire Law & Order franchise, the episode was “ripped from the headlines.” The segment dealt with the issue of domestic violence, using Rhianna and Chris Brown’s tumultuous (and vicious) relationship for fodder. […]
I am amazed by how my two youngest children have learned to negotiate their world. Although it may not be with immediacy, they have perfected the art of getting what they want with incredible efficiency. Stone and Liya are now 3 and 2 years old respectively, and even at this tender age have unwittingly taught […]
Nine years ago I went with a friend to Akropong to visit his family house. It was an impressive building that towered over all the other single story slate-roofed houses in the area. It was his grandmother’s residence and was a queen mother to the town. She had passed away earlier in the year. He […]
I have purposely ignored this story because I didn’t want to believe that there was any merit to it. Surely, there had to be more to the report. After all, how could a 60 year old man viciously slap a 19 month old baby, instruct his mother to shut her “nigger baby up”, and expect […]
The New Economy/The Great Recession/ whatever moniker you’ve assigned to this financial fiasco we’ve found ourselves in has forced millions of Americans into habits that are foreign and sometimes uncomfortable for them. These are indeed times of hardship, and with a Congress and White House that can’t seem to get anything done or work in […]
The elderly… what a manipulative, cunning bunch. Just wait! Give me a second to explain. This weekend I went with Aya to a senior assisted living home in Buckhead. She and the members of her Daisy troop went to the home to make Valentine’s Day cards with the residents so that they could earn their […]
What do Rhianna and my daughter have in common? Nothing at the moment, but if the retarded manner in which we raise and socialize girls to respect and preserve patriarchy at all costs doesn’t change, then I fear they will one day have very much in common indeed. I wish I could find a way […]
I was originally going to title this “Perpetuating the Myth of the Tooth Fairy”, but the verb in that sentence seemed so harsh and unworthy of such a beloved being. The Tooth Fairy was my most favorite mythological creature as a child. She still is. My parents had me utterly convinced of her existence. Never […]
When I go into my pediatrician’s office, there is a form I have to fill out for every visit. How many people live in the home? – 6 Does anyone smoke in the home or use tobacco products? – No Are there any fire arms in the home? – No Any pets? – Heck NO! […]
I took the kids to Wal-Mart today to start our Christmas shopping. Under normal circumstances I would already be done with our holiday purchases, but I decided to delay the stress this year. I love Christmas. I love the spirit of giving, and hot cocoa on cold winter nights, and poinsettias and Lifetime holiday movie […]
I’m an American citizen, but I haven’t had the quintessential experience of growing up “Black in America”. Like so many children of mixed cultural heritage, I was called “African booty scratcher” and all manner of pejoratives by people whose skin looked just like me. In response, I shied away from “Black life” and sought refuge […]
Only a certain type of parent will understand the essence of what I am about to share. There is an adrenaline rush that does not soon wane when you have got your tired, gnarled, grubby little hands on an object so desired by your children that it is all your family eats, lives and breathes. […]
Aya has a friend who hails from the Virgin Islands. Her name is Maddie. This particular girl got an American Girl doll for his birthday last year. “You do realize if I ge’ you this dall, it de only t’ing you geyin’ fuh your birthday, righ’?” her mother cautioned through slit eyes and teeth. The […]
They say there is no book on parenting, although volumes have been written on the subject. Raising a useful, well-functioning human being takes a lot of trial and error, luck and – at times – copious amounts of vodka. Or you could pray. I guess whichever works best in your world. I’ve never read a […]
Most people look forward to this time of the year with giddy anticipation. The coming of fall marks the true beginning of two of our most beloved seasons: football and boot season. It also marks the beginning of the holiday season, which until a few years ago meant Thanksgiving and Christmas exclusively. Somewhere along the […]
*Chants* Oh Heavenly Father on the Throne, please imbue Black people with a spirit of adoption or at least wealth oh Father, so that we might properly educate people of other races who wish to adopt our babies. Aaaaamen! I hardly know where to begin. What would you do in this situation? Today my kid’s […]
Last night I found myself in the midst of a rare crisis. While my husband’s thunderous snores ripped through the quiet night air I lay awake staring that the ceiling, tears streaming down the sides of my cheeks and puddling in my ear drums. I was thinking about my children. That in itself is not […]