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Essays in: Motherhood

Categories:  MotherhoodMarriageMadnessMusingsPhoto Essay FridayRHKOASay what??The South African SeriesUncategorizedGH2013
Motherhood

Special Deliver-weave!!

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(This is what it sounds like when doves cry) I’ve had 4 pregnancies in 6 years and every one of them has been unique. I’ve had preeclampsia, a placenta previa, a fetus suspected/diagnosed as having Down’s Syndrome, and one regular term birth with no issues.  In every instance, my hair has summed up the story […]

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Motherhood

New Mommy Blues

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You know what the hardest part about becoming a new mom is? It’s not the fact that you have this brand new life whose very survival is dependent upon your every breath; it’s not the irrevocable change to every facet of your life that comes with cohabiting with your new “room mate” (i.e. the baby); […]

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Motherhood

Errr…Hoo-hoo. Yeah.

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Man, I struggled with what to call this post. Here are a couple of titles I contemplated: 1) Self-exploration and my 5 year old 2) Your hoo-hoo is supposed to look like that 3) For the love of Pete, don’t scratch yourself down there! I struggled even more with whether or not to write this […]

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Motherhood

Every Little Girl Needs a Crazy Daddy

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You see that old Black man with the self-satisfied smirk on his face and a knot on his forehead? That’s Kwasi Gyekye – my dad and the first love of my life. I have measured every man’s ability by his; whether that be an ability to comfort me, provide for me, praise or belittle me […]

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Motherhood

Becoming "That" Mother

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Anyone who has spent any amount of time in a grocery store, a parking lot, a laundromat, or any public place has witnessed the antics of “that” mother. You know: The one who goes berserk because her kid was running unchaperoned down the aisle and ran into your cart, and subsequently gets royally pissed because […]

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Motherhood

This week, a Roq Star was born

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When my sister told me that she was pregnant last September, I was pretty sure she was lying. It’s hard to trust any one of my siblings – We all have a cruel sense of humor and every year we engage in a 9 month long marathon of practical jokery that we have termed “April […]

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Motherhood

Built to Make Babies

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In the world of reproductive activity there are 3 types of women. There are those who are barren and will never have children: In fact, some are so allergic to their mate’s semen that they break out in rashes upon seminal contact. Then there are those in the middle…the masses, who may or may not get pregnant […]

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Madness

Trying to Raise a Socially Decent Child

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I wanted to do a happy-happy post today; I did. But this is the second day in a row I’ve been called into my daughter’s school to discuss her “attitude” since she got back from her douche bag sire’s house this weekend. I swear, it’s like going back to 2007 all over again. Until recently, […]

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Motherhood

Your Neighborhood Narco Nanny

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Quick! Take a good look at this face. Would you let this man watch your kids? Look deeeep into his half closed eyes and tell me what’s the first thing you think of. Whatever it is, I bet you’ve got it all wrong. This is Chris, my daughter’s first baby sitter. That’s right. I entrusted […]

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Motherhood

That's Right. Call Your Daddy.

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Virtually every first time mom I know has the same complaint when it comes to their baby’s first word. From Accra to Amsterdam, the first word a baby invariably utters is “daddy” in some shape or form. My Indian friend’s children said “baba” first. My friend in Germany’s daughter broke her vocabulary cherry with “papa” […]

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Motherhood

Happy Mother's Day, Punk!

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I spent Mother’s day 2009 much the same way I’ll probably spend this one: Pregnant, fat and exhausted. What I’m hoping, however, is that my children will spare me the antics of last year’s holiday for the 2010 version. As I lay in my bed on May 10, 2009, weary from the grueling ritual that […]

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Motherhood

There Are No Bad Kids

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I read somewhere that there are no bad employees, only bad managers. If someone takes the time to fill out an application, get dressed for an interview and show up for work every day (or most days), then they obviously want/need to work. When their performance becomes an issue, it’s up to the manager to […]

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Motherhood

The Clean up Woman

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Recognizing that I am not coping well with this whole 3 kids in 4 years and a 4th on the way thing, my husband has offered me something that no other man has given me before: maid service. “I have a surprise for you babe,” he said gently, rubbing my shoulder. “Tomorrow morning I’m having […]

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Motherhood

Chile, you obviously don't know me

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I’ve figured out what makes raising kids so hard. It’s not the messes they create, or the feeding schedules if they are infants, or the incessant questions if they are toddlers/pre-schoolers…it’s the mere fact that you and your children are strangers to one another. It’s true. Yes, you may have brought them into this world with love […]

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Motherhood

When Pregnant People Fart

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Unless you have been pregnant or lived in a house with a pregnant woman, there is no earthly way you’re going to be able to relate to what I’m about to say here. All the same, I’m going to attempt to usher you into a side of pregnancy that very few books and fewer women […]

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Motherhood

Sometimes Being a Mom Means Giving Up

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The other night one of my best friends from college came over to visit the family. She’s seen me go from svelte, clueless Ghanaian to overweight, guarded ‘American’ in the 12 years that we’ve known each other. She’s seen me at my best and my worst during our college years and beyond. However, because she […]

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Motherhood

Why I Abhor Family Portraits

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My mother in law is a saint. She has a heart of gold and is overall just a good person. But like most saints and good-natured people, she is blind to the ugliness of this world. Whether it’s because these folks choose not to see it, or lack the ability to see the darkness coming, […]

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Motherhood

White Power!

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Quick! What was your first reaction when you read that title? I bet you images of skinheads and men in long white robes flashed in your mind. Maybe even a burning cross on a Black family’s front lawn. “White power” means a lot of things to different people, and I wager it is most closely […]

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Motherhood

Something New

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Typically when I hear the phrase “Something New”, I think of interracial couples and the angst they face a-la Sanaa Lathan and that very yummy blonde guy whose name always escapes me. But as of last week, the phrase “something new” means something completely different. It means the birth of a new child. Yes, I […]

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Motherhood

Navigating the mine field that is a Black Woman’s womb

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When I was growing up in Ghana in the home of a Black radical (my mother) and a regular dude (my dad), I was taught by my mother and other radicals of her ilk that “civilization was carried on the womb of the black woman”, that her children were “kings and queens”, that her “feet […]

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Marriage

Look here African Ladies – Let me tell you something

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Hmmm. Let me tell you something about motherhood and marriage that they don’t tell you when you are growing up. I’m about to go on a rant here, so be warned! You won’t make it to the end. I have much to say. Don’t listen to you parents and grandparents!! They are all liars and […]

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