“Before you think of adopting someone else’s child, you need to think of giving birth to your own!” – My father, 1990-something. There’s something in an African father who cannot abide the thought of his daughter raising another man’s child, I swear. Adoption. It’s a need and a passion that has lived inside of me […]
There are few things Marshall and I enjoy more than watching our little ones turn off the TV, unplug from the computer, putting down their hand held gaming devices, and picking up some dolls (or “real life action figures” in the boy’s case) in order to let their imaginations roam free. Under the right conditions […]
This Sunday was unseasonably pleasant; or maybe it was seasonably pleasant. You never can tell what season we’re supposed to be in in Georgia outside of the summer months. This Sunday it was spring. On Thursday we’re going back to winter. The sunshine had put my kids in a particularly good mood, which was fortunate […]
By all means, you’ve heard of Rachel Canning. You may not know her name, but you certainly know her story. She is the 18 year old high school student from New Jersey who is suing her parents for failing/refusing to pay her college tuition and weekly child support. The details come right out of a […]
It’s a joke in the Black community: giving your child a “resume acceptable” name at birth. Failure to do so will almost ensure that he or she will end up in prison, or worse, reduced to a lifelong career in field during which the highlights consist of inquiring if a patron “wants fries with that?” […]
I don’t know how you guys do it – you single parents out there. I’m not just referring to single moms. There are plenty of fathers who have been left in the sole care of their children for the same reasons women do, albeit less frequently. Perhaps you’ve suffered the pain of losing a spouse/partner […]
The English are fierce bulwarks when it comes to preserving the authenticity of their history, particularly when that history is portrayed on television or in film. That’s why there was such a fierce outcry when Richard Gere (an American) took on the role of Lancelot in First Knight; why the country nearly went up in […]
A common theme in the conversations I’ve had with my mixed race/biracial friends is the pressure they feel to “pick sides”. Some have likened it to being a child of divorce, questioning if they are being true enough to one parent, and if in doing so, is it at the expense of the heritage of […]
“There ain’t no black, there ain’t no black, there ain’t no black in the Union Jack!” When Bevis first moved to England from Ghana, this is what the kids would chant at her on the school yard. Bevis, now 40, is of Irish and Ghanaian heritage and spends her time divided between England and Ghana. […]
I spend a lot of time thinking about people, and I know that in our modern society that’s not considered a “good thing”. The general feeling is that we all need to concern ourselves with ourselves and let “me do me”. I can’t help it though, so there you have it. I’m about to take […]
Amy Chua, author of Battle Hymn of the Tiger Mother, has a new book coming out on February 4th. If Americans didn’t like Tiger Mother, they are REALLY going to hate her latest offering The Triple Package: Why Groups Rise and Fall in America. The book, which claims that certain ethnicities are superior to others […]
Ever since our kids have matured enough to grasp the concept of the holidays and the roles required of all the characters therein, we’ve had a hard time contending with the subject of Halloween. By “we”, I really mean “me”, because my husband doesn’t have difficulty dealing with the subject at all. As a devout […]
A new guy named Ethan* started at my job a few months ago. Ethan is nothing short of a curiosity. I’ve never met anyone like him. You see, Ethan is a bi-racial redneck. He has this gawd awful Southern twang that makes my ears burn, and his mannerisms comprise of tics I have only witnessed […]
As many parents do, I observe my children and reflect on my own childhood. Did I once really eat my own feces? Was I EVER that creative? Were my own parents as incensed as I am when my kids lie to me? The answers to all these things are “yes, of course”. Some things in […]
I know I’ve been quiet for a while. I’ve had a lot to say, but not much will to say it. David S – who I have conferred the title of Supreme MOM Squad Captain upon – often scolds me when I get into these moods, because it always affects the frequency of my blogging. […]
Apparently, Sheryl Underwood stirred up a small tsunami this weekend when she called afro hair “nasty” on her show The Talk that she co-hosts with Mrs. Osbourne ‘n dem. I missed it, because a) I don’t watch The Talk and 2) I was on the road on my way up to Ohio for Labor Day. […]
There is power in a name. Would you ever jauntily walk up to Queen Elizabeth and greet her as a “cracker b*tch”? No. You’re going to courtesy and refer to Britain’s royal monarch as “Her Highness”. You are going to respect her title and her rank. Think about next time you give someone dap and […]
Yesterday while I was at work, I saw a woman struggling under the weight of two boxes of men’s shoes. She was rail thin, with a gaunt face and chin length hair, the roots of which betrayed the fact that she was not born blonde with three inches of new growth. Her eyes darted around […]
I have (half) joked about how I can’t wait for my kids to grow up and start living independent lives. These people are now 3,4, 7 and 8, so their days of true independence are indeed quite, quite, quite far away. In my imaginations, they are all well-adjusted, successful people, enjoying whatever occupation or profession […]
I grew up poor although, I didn’t know it. Not in the sense that one knows they are female or knows that you can’t spend a day without air. I didn’t have certain knowledge of my poverty; just a peculiar inclination that my family was not rich. My mother used to drop hints like “we […]
Four kids. Nine years of motherhood. (Yes, I count those seven months I incubated Nadjah as part of my motherhood experience.) Almost a decade of pain, ushered in by one, whiney, obstinate, self-centered little brat: Caillou. I’ve talked about Caillou on M.O.M. on more than one occasion, I’m sure. I’ve told you how much I […]