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Essays in: The South African Series

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The South African Series

Table Mountain In Very Simple Terms

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Greetings, members of the MOM Squad and other Random Readers dropping by. You’ll have to forgive me this morning. This post will not be completed with any elaborate eloquence. My body is wracked by pain, but it is my duty to report the events as they unfolded as I made a fatuous attempt to climb […]

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The South African Series

The Pursuit of Chocolate is the Pursuit of Happiness

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Whenever I feel down, I medicate myself with food. And whenever I feel especially down, chocolate serves as my one true panacea. The range of emotions I’ve felt in my first few days in the country – which included elation, disappointment and despair, all finally culminating in a certain ambivalence – have forced me to […]

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The South African Series

It’s Da Furst o’ Da Month!

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You need this song playing in the back of your mind. It makes the storytelling so much more arresting. [youtube http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=bpBP9dALcWw] South Africans like to think they are immeasurably different from other Africans; when in fact, they are not. There is a wide spread and indoctrinated belief that all Africans north of the Limpopo are […]

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The South African Series

The Prodigal Sister

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In my bathroom at home we have a three foot tall stack of magazines. Architecture Digest, Essence, Relevant, Time, you name it – it’s in there. And in one of these magazines, it was suggested that readers venture off the beaten vacation path and give a try to ‘serving vacations’ or whatever the term was. […]

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The South African Series

Of (South) Africans and Entitlement

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You don’t come to Africa empty handed. You can try that mess if you want to, but it doesn’t bode well for a good experience. At some point, you will pay for that decision. It’s one of the themes you’ll often hear foreigners and White folks in South Africa discussing: This damned entitlement culture that […]

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The South African Series

So, It Took Five Days to Get to South Africa…

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Greetings from windy South Africa! I’ve been on the road and in the air since May 25th and I’m ever so grateful to have my feet on the ground. The last time the family went to South Africa I believed it was the most grueling experience I would ever endure. Seventeen hours in the air […]

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The South African Series

You Know What I Did Last Summer…

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Note: To my knowledge, there are no South Africans in the MOM Squad. For those SA readers who specifically drop by the blog and leave me nasty Twitter messages or comments that I never approve, I know that South Africa is not one big township. The following post is merely a summary of part of […]

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The South African Series

Hi! My Name’s Satan. Welcome to Your Flight Home.

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Dear Merciful Father in Heaven. I knew the flight home was going to be bad; I just had no idea HOW bad it was going to be. Like I said, we rushed out of the house early Monday morning with towels still in the dryer and no time to really clean. (And were scolded for […]

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The South African Series

Farewell BLOWS

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As a rule, I usually don’t have a problem with “goodbye” if I’m the one doing the leaving. My departure often places me in a position of power – one in which I have pity on the person(s) being left, because they are going to miss me after all, and not necessarily vice versa. This […]

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The South African Series

Mzansi Fo’ Sho!

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‘Mzansi’ means ‘south’, but refers specifically to South Africa. South Africa, for all its development and westernization is still Africa, and has some of the most amusing quirks I’ve ever encountered. Most have to do with policy, language barriers and culture. No, you can’t have it your way The first time we went out for […]

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The South African Series

You’ve got a Demon in you. How ‘bout some cake?

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Friday, August 12th. The weather forecast called for rain, and a slight drivel brought mist and mud to Qolweni. It was late afternoon, and the cows had already come in from the pasture. Two boys sat in the dimly lit room of the man from Port Elizabeth’s house. Are you tired of being bullied? Are […]

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The South African Series

The Road to Cape Town

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The road to Cape Town is littered with beauty. It is as though God reached into His sack or art and inspiration, gathered a fistful of its contents and cast it wantonly upon this singular corner of the Earth. It is adorned with shimmering lakes and onyx black rivers; as well as cattle, sheep and […]

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The South African Series

Can These Dry Bones Really Live?

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Sometimes going into the townships is like going into a war zone, and watching the dead remains of the troops that live there miraculously get up day after day to trudge through life. I look at the carnage all around me and ask myself how it’s possible. How do people go on like this day […]

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The South African Series

Black Widow Bungee

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July 27, 8:06 am: Hey, do you want to go bungy today? 10:16 am: Missed call from 08….. It was Brittany; the White girl with an adrenaline addiction. It wasn’t that I was ignoring her calls and texts – it was just that my body was still recovering from the unaccustomed exertion that I had […]

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The South African Series

Following White People Up the Mountain

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Yes. That is exactly what you think it is. That is a picture of my BUTT, which Robberg mountain essentially handed me this weekend. It never would have happened if I hadn’t been following after White people, pretending I could should do the things they do. These “white people things” include mountain climbing, shark tank […]

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The South African Series

The New Scramble for Africa

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Yesterday I was trolling Yahoo News and discovered that Dakar has its own fashion week! The organizer of the annual event is privately organized by model-turned-designer, Adama Paris. The event is in its ninth year and if I’m so fortunate, I plan to attend the 10th showing in 2012. Young Africans are returning to their […]

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The South African Series

Fishing for the Truth in a Barrel Full of Crabs

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Okay, Folk. I hate to talk about you, but you know how we are. Every time a Black person tries to do something positive, there are at least 40 other Black people waiting to pull them down. A few weeks ago, I brought you the story of Celia – the kind hearted woman who took […]

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The South African Series

Blue Ball Safari

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Driving through the township of Kurland, I noticed a number of signs: ‘Elephant Sanctuary’, ‘Snake Sanctuary’, ‘Wolf Sanctuary’, etc. I was a bit skeptical at first, because I wondered how feasible it was to have any sort of animal sanctuary within walking distance of a small village. There were no apparent wires or walls anywhere…perhaps […]

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The South African Series

Forgive My Attitude, Lord!

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This Sunday we went back to the broke down Church spot for Sunday service. We didn’t go last week, and our absence was apparently felt. Several people had asked if we were coming this week, so we made every effort to comply. I had mixed feelings about going though. How can I put this delicately? […]

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The South African Series

I’m Sorry…You Want to Be WHAT?

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Last night I was watching Malcolm X with Marshall, and there was a portion of the movie that I had never recalled seeing. Little Malcolm was sitting in the classroom of his foster home being admonished by one of his teachers. “Now Malcolm, you’ve written that you want to be a lawyer when you grow […]

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The South African Series

She Always ™ Misses Out on the Fun

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Last week one of my girls walked up to me and told me that she was not coming to the SCAB program anymore. My heart dropped. “Why not?” I asked furtively. “Did I do something?” “Oh no, Ms. Malaka.” “Then why?” I pressed. “I’ll tell you afterwards,” she promised. I was on edge for the […]

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