I’ve discovered that it takes about a week to settle into any new environment, and I’m happy to report that we’re finally settled! But can I confess one thing before I move on to the ponies and rainbows? My confession is this: I dread rainstorms in South Africa. Previously, the thought of a night spent […]
I wanted kicks, and I was not disappointed. First of all, let me go ahead and admit that every day that I have spent in the Western Cape has been akin to a goofy, feel good, B Christian movie. When we pulled up to the after school facility (which doubles as a church/community center/anything you […]
On Monday morning Marshall and Michael went down to the rental agent’s office downtown to give them our list of “observations”. She was aware of all of them. When Marshall asked if someone could come in to repair the water damage and paint over the mold, he was told ‘no’. But she at least made […]
Marshall had been researching properties for us to rent a few months before we left Atlanta. Of course the nicest one we saw had a pool and hundreds of square feet per person; and the worst had 1 toilet, no sink and we’d all have to sleep in the closet. Fortunately we found one that […]
We spent our first night in the country at a bed and breakfast called The Lily Pad. The owner’s name is Mandie, who incidentally shared the same name with Aya’s pre-K teacher. This pleased Aya to no end, and she spent a good part of the night asking Ms. Mandie as many questions as she […]
Jo’burg As far as airports go Oliver Tumbo is pretty nice. As far as African airports go, Oliver Tumbo has to be the nicest by far. It modern and well planned. I compared it to Kotoka in Accra – the ‘Gateway to Africa’ – with its leaky roofs and cramped quarters, and was happy to […]
Atlanta I left Atlanta on a really sour note. I was still enraged by the bumbling incompetency of my church, and further enraged by Marshall’s apparent nonchalant attitude toward that incompetency. When my face silently, but plainly bore the evidence of my displeasure, I was informed that at some point I would have “to get […]
I used to be an insufferable pessimist. How Marshall ever endured as long as he did is truly beyond me. Heck, how I survived that long is beyond me as well. My life hitherto to my healing (because I’m a firm believer that depression is a disease) was motivated by fear. I had to do […]
Dear Readers: I’ve come to a really tough decision today. This is going to be my last blog entry. I’ll be shutting down M.O.M come tomorrow. The blog has been a huge part of my daily life Ah, screw it. I’m not going to give a sappy, ridiculous explanation. Who even cares? Thanks for sticking […]
Douche Bag is an amazing human being – and I don’t mean that in a complimentary way. How someone has managed to bungle their way this far through life with such stunted mental capacity and have achieved any modicum of success gives credence to the story of Forrest Gump. However, unlike Forrest who at his […]
Last night I ‘sold’ my first pair of “I got pregnant and now my feet have gone from a size 9 – 10 and can’t fit these shoes anymore so come and buy these shoes at a steeeep discount” (http://mindofmalaka.wordpress.com/2011/01/20/big-feet/) shoes to my friend and senior from high school, Pearl K. (Please: When reading […]
Men despise things that are easily acquired – The Kama Sutra of Vatsyayana Ladies: If your confidence is a fragrance, then your desperation is a stench. This is a loose deduction from the above statement, but you’ll see where I’m going with this pretty quickly. There are few things more frustrating than watching a friend […]
Okay. So I wasn’t raped, but that airport worker’s hands had gone far enough into my pants to find my ‘second virginity’ and snatch it from me. All this hoopla in the media this week about full body scanners and patdowns just reminded me of my own ordeal last month. (Put your drink down if […]
My BFFFL, Nana Darkoa, though young is very wise. While we were collaborating on a would-be project a little over a year ago that was meant to be very “Ghana-centric”, I voiced a concern that was itching my conscience. “How well would this be received from us?” I asked. “You know we’re not ‘real’ Ghanaians. […]
You know how it is when you go back to Africa. You expect everything to be African. For the long time returnee, a part of you still expects to see little half naked boys running down chasing old car tires and small girls cooking with konko tins over a coal pot. In the same vein […]
Let me tell you something about Mama Africa. She is a HARD parent. She will force you to do certain things; whether you yield to those things willingly or are beaten into submission is up to you. By all means, YOU WILL WALK in Africa. Certainly, you WILL adopt one of her of local vernacular […]
Accra – 1977 Kwasi: Ei. Rex. You are back. Akwaaba. Rex: Yerhs! I jess gort balk into tern tha oddar der. Kwasi (confused): Uhhh…Ok. Oh! How is your mother? Rex: Orh! *Hahaha*! Sher’s foine, y’knaw? Yerhs. Doin’ rally well. *Heheheh*! Kwasi (annoyed): Chaley, Rex. In fact, I don’t understand what you are saying. Why are […]
This is an open letter to Delta Airlines, those bloody douche bag wankers. To: The head dude/dudess at Delta Re: An extraordinary customer experience. Dear Delta Airlines, I am writing to congratulate you for assembling a staff that provided me with extraordinary customer service this Sunday on October 17th at Kotoka International Airport in Accra. […]
A purple squirrel is a mythical creature; a being of lore. Something that has peculiar characteristics (like purple fur), but for the most part can still be identified as a squirrel. It’s kinda like a unicorn. Last Monday a woman in black cloth and a black hajib approached me at my kids’ school in Adenta. She looked ‘African’ (but certainly […]
Last night I almost threw up at the pharmacy counter. The baby had run out of diapers, and my father requested that I bring a pack home. I only had 40 GHc left in my wallet for the week, and it was going to take at least 15 GHc to get home from where I […]
Hei! It has taken me up till this week to get in step with the way technology works in Ghana. Cell phone conversations are fast, internet connections are slow, TV stations end their transmissions (albeit it briefly until the generator kicks on) when the lights go off in their area. I got my first taste of […]