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The South African Series

The Stars Shine Brighter in South Africa

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  It’s not hard to fall in love South Africa, and now that I’m here I can totally understand my husband’s lingering attraction to it.  When you live in a place where beauty surrounds you, it’s not hard to leave your old Western life behind and fail to give it a second thought. However, before […]

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The South African Series

The Magnificent Mainee

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Yay! ‘Sister Adjoa’ has come! When you live in Africa, it is imperative to have some sort of household help. This will be in the form of a house keeper, nanny or gardener, and if you’re really balling, you’ll have all 3. Not only is it important (and very helpful) for a ‘foreigner’ to have […]

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The South African Series

Why Can’t I Quit You?!?!

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This house and I are in a toxic relationship. I know exactly how Heath Ledger felt in Brokeback Mountain. Well, not exactly.   One of the best things about my stay in SA so far has been this house. Ironically, it’s also been one of the worst. You see that behind me? That’s a rooftop […]

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The South African Series

How Would You Like Your Sunday?

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The churches in Plett are either established denominational churches (the Anglicans seem to have a strong presence here) or a disorganized smattering of miniscule congregations. None of the Americans that we know really GO to church here – I’m guessing because it’s not really their flavor – and does their own thing on Sunday. One […]

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The South African Series

The Good Stuff

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I’ve discovered that it takes about a week to settle into any new environment, and I’m happy to report that we’re finally settled! But can I confess one thing before I move on to the ponies and rainbows? My confession is this: I dread rainstorms in South Africa. Previously, the thought of a night spent […]

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The South African Series

Kicks and Clicks

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I wanted kicks, and I was not disappointed. First of all, let me go ahead and admit that every day that I have spent in the Western Cape has been akin to a goofy, feel good, B Christian movie. When we pulled up to the after school facility (which doubles as a church/community center/anything you […]

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The South African Series

Waka Waka? ‘Cause this is Africa

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On Monday morning Marshall and Michael went down to the rental agent’s office downtown to give them our list of “observations”. She was aware of all of them. When Marshall asked if someone could come in to repair the water damage and paint over the mold, he was told ‘no’. But she at least made […]

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The South African Series

Honey! We’re home!

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Marshall had been researching properties for us to rent a few months before we left Atlanta. Of course the nicest one we saw had a pool and hundreds of square feet per person; and the worst had 1 toilet, no sink and we’d all have to sleep in the closet. Fortunately we found one that […]

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The South African Series

Those Fashionable South Africans

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We spent our first night in the country at a bed and breakfast called The Lily Pad. The owner’s name is Mandie, who incidentally shared the same name with Aya’s pre-K teacher. This pleased Aya to no end, and she spent a good part of the night asking Ms. Mandie as many questions as she […]

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The South African Series

…and even more planes

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Jo’burg As far as airports go Oliver Tumbo is pretty nice. As far as African airports go, Oliver Tumbo has to be the nicest by far. It modern and well planned. I compared it to Kotoka in Accra – the ‘Gateway to Africa’ – with its leaky roofs and cramped quarters, and was happy to […]

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The South African Series

Getting Here – Planes, planes

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Atlanta I left Atlanta on a really sour note. I was still enraged by the bumbling incompetency of my church, and further enraged by Marshall’s apparent nonchalant attitude toward that incompetency. When my face silently, but plainly bore the evidence of my displeasure, I was informed that at some point I would have “to get […]

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Uncategorized

How Ghana Cured My Depression

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I used to be an insufferable pessimist. How Marshall ever endured as long as he did is truly beyond me. Heck, how I survived that long is beyond me as well. My life hitherto to my healing (because I’m a firm believer that depression is a disease) was motivated by fear. I had to do […]

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Uncategorized

My Last Blog Entry

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Dear Readers: I’ve come to a really tough decision today. This is going to be my last blog entry. I’ll be shutting down M.O.M come tomorrow. The blog has been a huge part of my daily life Ah, screw it. I’m not going to give a sappy, ridiculous explanation. Who even cares? Thanks for sticking […]

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Uncategorized

Defying the Odds: A Tribute to Giovanni

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Douche Bag is an amazing human being – and I don’t mean that in a complimentary way. How someone has managed to bungle their way this far through life with such stunted mental capacity and have achieved any modicum of success gives credence to the story of Forrest Gump. However, unlike Forrest who at his […]

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Uncategorized

“I Go Pay You Morrow” Buyer

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  Last night I ‘sold’ my first pair of “I got pregnant and now my feet have gone from a size 9 – 10 and can’t fit these shoes anymore so come and buy these shoes at a steeeep discount”  (http://mindofmalaka.wordpress.com/2011/01/20/big-feet/) shoes to my friend and senior from high school, Pearl K. (Please: When reading […]

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Uncategorized

Your Confidence is a Fragrance

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Men despise things that are easily acquired – The Kama Sutra of Vatsyayana Ladies: If your confidence is a fragrance, then your desperation is a stench. This is a loose deduction from the above statement, but you’ll see where I’m going with this pretty quickly. There are few things more frustrating than watching a friend […]

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Uncategorized

I Too Was Raped by The TSA

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Okay. So I wasn’t raped, but that airport worker’s hands had gone far enough into my pants to find my ‘second virginity’ and snatch it from me. All this hoopla in the media this week about full body scanners and patdowns just reminded me of my own ordeal last month. (Put your drink down if […]

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Uncategorized

Who is a Ghanaian?

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My BFFFL, Nana Darkoa, though young is very wise. While we were collaborating on a would-be project a little over a year ago that was meant to be very “Ghana-centric”, I voiced a concern that was itching my conscience. “How well would this be received from us?” I asked. “You know we’re not ‘real’ Ghanaians. […]

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Perming Kits and Bleaching Cream

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You know how it is when you go back to Africa. You expect everything to be African. For the long time returnee, a part of you still expects to see little half naked boys running down chasing old car tires and small girls cooking with konko tins over a coal pot. In the same vein […]

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Uncategorized

Ghana Ghost Stories

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Let me tell you something about Mama Africa. She is a HARD parent. She will force you to do certain things; whether you yield to those things willingly or are beaten into submission is up to you. By all means, YOU WILL WALK in Africa. Certainly, you WILL adopt one of her of local vernacular […]

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Uncategorized

Lady's Shades n' Slangs

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Accra – 1977 Kwasi: Ei. Rex. You are back. Akwaaba. Rex: Yerhs! I jess gort balk into tern tha oddar der. Kwasi (confused): Uhhh…Ok. Oh! How is your mother? Rex: Orh! *Hahaha*! Sher’s foine, y’knaw? Yerhs. Doin’ rally well. *Heheheh*! Kwasi (annoyed): Chaley, Rex. In fact, I don’t understand what you are saying. Why are […]

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