I got back to Atlanta two weeks ago, turned on the TV, and was confronted with a horrible reality: Comcast had changed our service. Many of my beloved channels are GONE. You know, when they took away G4 a year ago, they took with it my nightly 4 hour Star Trek marathon. And I was […]
Part 2: Kwasia Dat Kwasia dat trans: That foolish person/thing. Some of you have journeyed with me for the last 5 1/2 years through the metaphoric hip-deep cesspool that Douche Bag has attempted to drag me through. Fortunately, I have managed to hover above the mire, coming out with only the stink clinging to me […]
My BFFFL, Nana Darkoa, though young is very wise. While we were collaborating on a would-be project a little over a year ago that was meant to be very “Ghana-centric”, I voiced a concern that was itching my conscience. “How well would this be received from us?” I asked. “You know we’re not ‘real’ Ghanaians. […]
You know how it is when you go back to Africa. You expect everything to be African. For the long time returnee, a part of you still expects to see little half naked boys running down chasing old car tires and small girls cooking with konko tins over a coal pot. In the same vein […]
Let me tell you something about Mama Africa. She is a HARD parent. She will force you to do certain things; whether you yield to those things willingly or are beaten into submission is up to you. By all means, YOU WILL WALK in Africa. Certainly, you WILL adopt one of her of local vernacular […]
Accra – 1977 Kwasi: Ei. Rex. You are back. Akwaaba. Rex: Yerhs! I jess gort balk into tern tha oddar der. Kwasi (confused): Uhhh…Ok. Oh! How is your mother? Rex: Orh! *Hahaha*! Sher’s foine, y’knaw? Yerhs. Doin’ rally well. *Heheheh*! Kwasi (annoyed): Chaley, Rex. In fact, I don’t understand what you are saying. Why are […]
This is an open letter to Delta Airlines, those bloody douche bag wankers. To: The head dude/dudess at Delta Re: An extraordinary customer experience. Dear Delta Airlines, I am writing to congratulate you for assembling a staff that provided me with extraordinary customer service this Sunday on October 17th at Kotoka International Airport in Accra. […]
A purple squirrel is a mythical creature; a being of lore. Something that has peculiar characteristics (like purple fur), but for the most part can still be identified as a squirrel. It’s kinda like a unicorn. Last Monday a woman in black cloth and a black hajib approached me at my kids’ school in Adenta. She looked ‘African’ (but certainly […]
Last night I almost threw up at the pharmacy counter. The baby had run out of diapers, and my father requested that I bring a pack home. I only had 40 GHc left in my wallet for the week, and it was going to take at least 15 GHc to get home from where I […]