Why Picking Up the Mother’s Day Mother Load is the Best Decision You Will Make This Weekend.

Okay. Fine. Fine! I admit that getting a set of 5 books for a cool GHC 100 might not constitute the “best decision” you will make this weekend. I mean, you could make a first ever decision to invest in mutual funds that could yield you thousands of dollars eventually…but if you’re looking for immediate gratification, the Mother Load is the way to go!

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I often say that if you like my blog, you’ll love my books. MOM provides a snapshot into the vast world of the humble blogger you’ve come to know and love (dare I say adore) over the years. Deborah Ahenkoroah once described my writing style as “quirky African”.

I like that.

Makes me sound like a Gilmore Girl, but where Gilmore is pronounced “Gyekye”.

Anyways. Let me tell you about this promotion that’s going on from May 6th -10th!

YAY!!!
YAY!!! Promotions!!!!

But before I tell you about the promotion, let me tell you about Close to Home! (There’s a lot going on in my writing world.) Just released on Tuesday, Close to Home is the story of a little boy named Carlos Elamin who wants to fly and wistfully lusts after adventure. The oly trouble is, he’s afraid.  He ends up going on several exploits with his mother, all from his living room window. How does that happen, you ask. Pick up a copy and read along with your KG – 1st grader to find out! Guess what? No…guess! I have 2 copies to give away.

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The first two people in the comments section to correctly name the other blog I co-founded AND answer what Yaa’s consequences for trapping death in a basket were get a signed copy each!

I originally entered Close to Home in a literary contest sponsored by Lee & Low books and prayed I wouldn’t win. Ah. Malaka, why would you enter a contest and hope to lose?  Because I wanted to collaborate with Poka Arts Studios again for this book. Didn’t know if I could trust the publisher to get the images right…and Poka ALWAYS gets it right. Lee & Low were going to chose the illustrator for the winning title(s). So now, the rest is history… Or the future. You know what I mean.

Anyways. Close to Home is available on Amazon.com.

 

IF YOU’RE IN GHANA, YOU SHOULD GET THE MOTHER’S DAY MOTHER LOAD!

Seriously, where else can you get an entire library of books for just GHC 100? In this Mahama ecomini? I don’t see how! This is what you get in your Mother’s Day Mother Load set of reading awesomeness:

  • Sally and the Butterfly, the first pick your own path book written by a Ghanaian author.
  • Yaa Traps Death in a Basket, a graphic novel featuring demi-gods, a tokoloshe and a girl who finds her courage in the wilderness.
  • Lover of Her Sole, a Ghanaian-Nigerian Cinderella story.
  • The Daughters of Swallows, an action packed tome that has been described as Rambo meets Romancing the Stone.
  • Madness & Tea, a book about absolutely nothing…where “nothing” is utter hilarity.

With this fantastic set, you will experience a range of emotions, some that you may have long thought you were no longer capable of sustaining. You will be joyful, apprehensive, horny, angry, frightened, jubilant, nostalgic… But two books in particular are going to make you horny.

Have you noticed a pattern about my release dates? Sure you have! All of my books (Madness & Tea being the only exception) are released on or around Mother’s Day weekend. It’s because my books are my babies. I send them out into the world and hope that someone will love them as much as I do. Books need homes. Books need you. You need the Mother Load…

….which is only available on the African continent. But don’t worry! If you’re in the Dee-yah-spo-rah and want to get a gift for your mommy or auntie (heck, even your daddy) back home, StoreFoundry can take your order from any where in the world and make sure that your package gets there safe and in a timely manner. You have until the 10th! Don’t ask me about any discounts after that.

Order by clicking here.

Don’t forget to play for your free signed copy of Close to Home!

 

 

My Children Have Started Pranking Me Already. These Wikkid Pipo. And I'm Having a Sale on All My Books.

As I type, it’s 3:35 am…so I don’t know how much sense this post is going to make. I’m sure I’ll look over it at noon and ask myself, “Self! Were you on crack when you wrote this?”

And I’ll say, “Naw, Self! I was just tired as Usain Bolt chasing a Nima boy for stealing his yams!”

What?

Exactly.

A couple of things are running through my mind right now. Like, why is Liya (the 5 year old) in my bed snoring and stealing all of my cover? She hasn’t come to my room with a nightmare…well, ever. Why is she here today on THIS day? Because she’s pranking me. And she doesn’t even know it. I’ll show her at 6 am who is boss around these parts for her treachery. I won’t pour milk for her!

Secondly, I suspect my children were behind the Soy Milk incident yesterday. The cap of my unopened soy had been cut into a perfect triangle. This being America, it could only mean one thing: some psychopath was trying to kill me! Mmmm. You know Americans enjoy poisoning other Americans by tampering with their food and medicine. I spent 30 minutes trying to return that milk last night. My local Publix is only 1 mile away. Why did it take that long? Because my children had conspired with the city of Roswell to punch out the traffic lights and back up traffic all the way to Crabapple Rd!

These children with their Larteh inherited magical powers. I’ll show them!

My second born has been talking about all the YouTube videos she’s been watching and how she can’t wait to release all the pranks she’s picked up over the past few days. Humph. I’m going to go through her viewing history so I can be ready. 9 year olds are cute…but they can be ruthless little things.

Look at me. All paranoid about the dangers a 9 year old and some peanut butter pose…

Lastly, and now I’m going to bed because I’m legit seeing hoofed mermaids dancing across my screen, all my books on StoreFoundry are 14%. Today only! Why? Because I’m feeling generous, despite the fact that my surroundings and the people who dwell therein are conspiring against my greatness. I no go chop last in Jesus’ name!

Click the link here to get your items on sale. But not if you live in the UK or America! Shipping is coming from Ghana and is like forty bucks. If you spend $40 in shipping to save 14% dierrr, you’ve pranked yourself! Screen Shot 2016-04-01 at 3.49.33 AM

Who wants to guess why everything is 14% off?