Latest Essays

Time is a funny construct that humans have created. Unlike seasons where the natural world responds to rhythm, environment, and circumstance, time is fixed, rigid and unyielding. There is a beginning and an end. And so we have the concept of a new year. New year pressure is real. If you are one of the […]

If you steal a glance at my Instagram page, you’ll find a feed filled with snapshots of joy: family vacations, safaris, dinners out, and elaborate home-cooked meals in our quaint little town. The photos tell a story of happiness, a carefully curated narrative that reflects the general warmth and love in our family. And for […]

I manage a small team of female creatives who work in the SRHR and pleasure space. Every day, we each receive messages—either in our DMs, social signals, or from the government—that our lives as Black and/or queer women do not matter. Some of these messages imply threats. Others are expressly made. The building pressure of […]

My Dearest Girls, Today, I write this with a heart both heavy and hopeful. Heavy, because there is an apology I owe you. Hopeful, because I believe in the strength you possess to live differently, to choose differently, and to find a freedom that even I am only just beginning to understand. When we become […]

The day I turned 40, I celebrated with a Prince dance party, a decadent chocolate cake and a vow to delay getting a mammogram for as long as possible. I’d heard too many tales about this rite of passage for women, and I wanted no part of it. The whole procedure sounded like a crime […]

Only the most courageous, foolish or demented of people will admit what I am about to tell you now. I have wished an ex-lover dead. This is the sort of thing that one does not proclaim in public or genteel company, but amongst true friends and the most trusted of confidants, the words are raged […]

They say Ghana is a peaceful country because while Ghanaians will always raise their voices when provoked, they will never raise their fists. I always interpreted this to mean that unlike some of our other West African counterparts who are always spoiling for a good fight and primed to see revolutionary change, Ghanaians are cowardly […]

I know a girl – and her relationship to me is not important, only that I know her well – whose love language is filtered through the most precious resource available to humankind at this stage of our development. She needs quality time. My good sis is out here suffering. If you’re unfamiliar with the […]

I love living in George. It’s an old city fighting to find a new identity. What makes George such a popular place to settle and raise a family are the same reasons that the semi-nomadic Khoisan did so for thousands of years before European settlers “discovered” the area and put their permanent stamp on it. […]

By the time I hit ‘publish’ on this post, Nadjah will be seated in her first class and most likely will be on her way across campus (or perhaps next door?) for her next lecture. I don’t know. There are so many unknowns. All I know for sure is today, August 21, 2023, I became […]

Reels.  If you’re on Instagram, you’ve seen them, shared them and even possibly made your fair share of them. Some people (like me) make Reels because they are a handy tool with simple templates for quick updates and storytelling. Other people plan and make Reels with the sole intent and hope of going viral. The […]

“Your son should NEVER ask me to do anything for him EVER again! I’m not taking him to karate, I’m not helping him with school work, I’m not even going to buy deodorant for his funky ass! From now on, YOU raise him!” My eyes blazed. My heart thudded wildly against my rib cage. My […]

Written by Elena Stewart Being a parent is one of the most rewarding experiences in life. But it can also be overwhelming and chaotic. There are so many joys to be found in raising a family, but there can also be moments of chaos and overwhelm that come along with the task. To make your […]

A journalist sent me a message last week, expressing interest in my work on Adventures From the Bedrooms of African Women. When it comes to this project, I have been the force behind the scenes, rather than the face out front for many myriad reasons. Those reasons have included the existence of my children, some […]

Happy new year, dearest Readers and Lurkers! I know I haven’t been consistent with keeping up with Mind of Malaka in 2022 – and to be honest that’s not likely to change in 2023 if the circumstances that kept me away from this beloved space are replicated this year. Yet as always, if you’re still […]

I thought we were going to die. But before we did, I figured I’d get some orange juice to quench my thirst and hopefully quell the raging headache pulsing through the vein in the left side of my face. Orange juice has no cranial healing properties, but I couldn’t be expected to be rational in […]

It was a balmy night in Nairobi; one where the leaves rustled melodically in the gentle breeze and the stars peeked through the veil of cloud cover to wink at we mere mortals below. Our working group had convened to have a final dinner together before we all went our separate ways. Perhaps it was […]

A friend of mine has created The Happy Company (THC), a lifestyle brand that is “founded on the agenda to spread happyness“. They prefer to remain anonymous (if such a thing is possible anymore) so that people will associate with and support the agenda, rather than the person behind it. They recently asked me to […]

Mr. Tei loved to whip children. At least, that was the reputation he had earned on the primary school block when I arrived in 1986. Only ‘Brah’ Sammy came in at a close second with a love for attaching cane to tender Class 3 flesh. It was rumored that both men would arrive on school […]

When you are preparing to bring a child into this world for the first time, there is no shortage of advice doled out to new parents. “Don’t hold the baby too much, or she’ll get spoiled!”“Baby won’t sleep? Let her cry it out through the night. Crying never killed no baby.”“Put the baby on her […]