Mind of Malaka

Should we legalize weed? – Uhh..YEAH!

Posted on November 23, 2009
by Malaka
with 5 Comments

Weed, weed, weed. My feelings about Mary Jane are a little mixed. After all, one of my first boyfriends told me that if I "didn't like him smoking weed, I could break up with him!" I was shocked. He had chosen the 'other woman' over…

Say what??

Hey Ladies! If you’re single, it’s all your fault.

Posted on November 23, 2009
by Malaka
with 2 Comments

Married women are only married because they understood men before they jumped the broom/tied the knot. You don't gain this knowledge afterward, which is why women who have been single for 20+ years will continue to be so until they wise up! This is for…

Marriage

It's been 13 months and I'm still pregnant

Posted on November 23, 2009
by Malaka
with 0 Comments

Peeing, peeing, peeing. I've been pregnant with the SAME child for over a year it seems, and my nights and days are spent peeing. 80% of the time spent after I lay my head on the pillow is spent lumbering to the toilet to pee,…

Motherhood

Va-ca-shon!!

Posted on November 23, 2009
by Malaka
with 0 Comments

I'm about to go on vacation at Hotel de Northside Hospital. Train pulls out of the station at 7 am sharp! I can't wait! No more screaming kids for two whole days. The next child I hear crying will be the one being yanked from…

Marriage

I AM ON STRIIIIKKKEEE!!!!

Posted on November 23, 2009
by Malaka
with 0 Comments

THAT DOES IT! I will no longer try to improve the well being and hygiene of my family. I give up on that part of motherhood. From now on, my obligations are only the newborn and myself. From THIS DAY FORTH, I vow to be…

Musings

OH Ame-ri-KKK-a!!

Posted on November 23, 2009
by Malaka
with 0 Comments

At first I was just going to make a witty status update about what relentless bulldog byiatches Nancy Grace and that Velez-Mitchell chick were (and how you have to be a heartless whore to have your own show on HLN these days), but the media…

Motherhood

Is having a boy different, you ask? For Nana Appiah-Korang

Posted on November 23, 2009
by Malaka
with 0 Comments

Nana, You asked me a few months ago to let you know how different it is to have a boy after having two girls. Your son's conception, like mine, was unplanned. In FACT, my brother refers to my son as "False Start", as he was…

Musings

No, really. What if the slaves DID have social networking?

Posted on November 23, 2009
by Malaka
with 0 Comments

If I had to choose a date and time to be born, I would most certainly pick January 24, 1978...That's my birthday for all you who don't know. By that date, 400 years of slavery had just ended 112 or so years ago, reconstruction had…

Motherhood

Where do you see yourself in 5 years?

Posted on November 23, 2009
by Malaka
with 0 Comments

When I was getting ready to go to college in 1996, that was the big interview question we couldn't wait to be asked from a potential employer. We had whole sessions about the appropriate answers to give, interview gems and catch phrases that would wow…

Madness

Why Ghanaian children will continue to be molested

Posted on November 23, 2009
by Malaka
with 0 Comments

Anyone who has spent any amount of time in Ghana knows that it is a land of great contradiction. The locals scrub their white fête attire with Omo and bleach until it glistens whiter than the driven snow, and then hang the clothing to dry…